If a tree falls in the Forest...
it's so weird being in the apartment by myself. the weird thing is it's not like i've never lived alone before. i lived alone my junior and senior year in college and i loved it. but now that i'm used to having patrick here (annoying me) it's weird to not have him here. one thing for sure is you start talking out loud to yourself (more than usual). i'm sure he doesn't feel the same way because he gets control of the remote and gets to eat all the nasty carl's jr's he wants. i should be cleaning my very messy home but that's no fun. what did i do all that time by myself? well most of it i was in classes or rehearsals so that filled my day. it'd be a lot better if weekend tv didn't suck so bad. plus i've been burning through the dvr. and if you're going to tell me to go do something outdoors-don't. me and the outdoors don't really go together. i guess i could go to the pool... my days here pretty much consist of working out, looking for jobs, tv, making dinner. it makes me think i will not want to be a stay at home mom. no i'm not an idiot and do realise that when you have kids there's more crap to do but not when they're babies. well except feed them and wipe their butts. don't get me wrong i love babies but they sleep so much i would get bored. i certainly wouldn't waste my free time cleaning. booo. that's what maids are for. if i could afford a maid i'd totally get one. or i could just have magical powers like in matilda or sleeping beauty. then i could make the rooms clean themselves and save the cash. yeah i think i'll get to work on that one.

so patrick and i were really bored one night and starting watching this awful vh1 reality show called "megan wants a millionaire". it's totally staged and there's no way it's for real (so unlike rock of love). well patrick told me the show got put on hold because of a scandal and he made me look it up. it turns out that one of the contestants is under investigation for murdering his playboy model ex wife. she was found outside their apartment naked in a suitcase. isn't that a really shitty way to die. i would hope that if my ex tried to kill me they'd at least keep my clothes on. patrick i'm sure was very heartbroken that he won't find out won't millionaire she chose. it's rumored that he was actually the winner. if so, think how lucky that megan skank feels. she coulda been the next victim! speaking of rock of love, can you believe patrick didn't know about ed hardy!? he said that ever since he asked me about it he sees ed hardy stuff all the time. i actually like some of his stuff but i just cant spend 100 bucks on a t-shirt.

song lyrics of the day:
i turned my collar to the cold and damp
when my eyes were stabbed by the flash of
a neon light
that split the night



p.s how would you like to live in a city called placentia? nasty (it's pronounced placenta afterall in ca you make up your own pronunciation of places.)